I found out that
he'd been kissing boys at clubs where boys go to kiss other boys in
clubs. I found out that he'd been touching them too sometimes when I
was away at my mum's or whatever. he'd bring them here into the bed
we bought together when we moved in last year after we'd broken up
over the fact that we didn't see each other enough and then got back
together when we found this place really cheaply online. he would
touch them until they came and they would more or less always stay
over apparently too. the way he told me was just to say it exactly
like that like “I have kissed and touched boys here” when we were
fooling around in bed one morning and I couldn't get him hard and I
asked him if he was okay “I have something to tell you” he said
and I was all “okay what” and I thought maybe he'd say he was
stressed about work or school or something maybe that's why he wasn't
getting hard as much anymore but no it was a lot worse as it turns
out. what I said next was “what?” and I almost threw up with the
pain in my stomach of sadness and also a little bit of disgust even
though I definitely don't have anything against boys kissing and
touching other boys but I didn't even know that he liked that sort of
thing. anyway he looked really sad and then said that thing “I'm so
sorry I didn't mean for it to be this way” and I was so mad at him
because that's such a standard run of the mill move script bullshit
response and he was never like that about anything. I cried and then
I got out of bed and asked him to get out of bed too and he didn't
and he asked me to get back into bed and said sorry so many times.
